Worldview: The Rambling Road: Stimming

I don’t tend to talk about this much because it’s hard to describe to anyone who doesn’t deal with it, but I have long had trouble keeping my mind on task. This problem is more than simple distractedness or absentmindedness, but I am not making a to claim to any kind of condition to describe it. It’s just always been a part of me, and over the years, I’ve learned various ways to cope with it when it gets bad enough.

One of the ways I’ve learned is a process I call “stimming”. Basically described, when my brain gets most chaotic, sometimes intense investment in focused, mentally taxing activities coupled with liberal use of stimulants helps tame the noise. Yes, I realize this is likely a form of self-medication, but it works and helps things from getting worse (trust me, we don’t want worse than chaos).

The downside of this process is that it can sometimes develop its own destructiveness. Stimming was the reason I started smoking once upon a time (I’ve long since stopped), for example, and counteracting the effects of the stimulants can have its own cost (I was a functional drunk for a while, but that too is now in the past). Then again, in the balance, those sorts of things aren’t much worse than the side effects of the drugs commonly prescribed for conditions like mine, so there’s that.

I’m not bringing this subject up as a recommendation, because I would not wish this sort of thing on anyone. Rather, I bring it up because it can be mastered, and if you’re struggling with similar, I’m someone who understands.

DLH

Read more at my The Rambling Road weblog...

Read more at my Worldview site...

Worldview: The Rambling Road: Discipline

Yesterday, I wrote about being discontented and how that state drives me in so many areas, now including health. Today, I want to write about my bane: discipline.

It’s surprising that discipline is a shortcoming of mine given my natural inclination to plan, but having lived with that reality for a long time, I can tell you without any doubt that I am inclined to be easily distracted and to be lazy when it comes to executing those plans.

Yet, most things in life require some degree of discipline to get done. Even stuff I really enjoy doing has parts to them that I don’t, and that’s where the discipline comes in.

I’m learning that notion now in spades. I’m not in a position anymore to get distracted or get lazy or give up. I have to see this through.

And in realizing that fact, I’m also realizing discipline can be learned in ways I’d never given consideration to. Learning discipline, I’m discovering, is like learning to ride a bike. It takes time and practice, but the more I do it and the longer I do it, the easier it becomes.

In the end, for me, the biggest motivator for discipline is the goal I am trying to reach. In the case of health, I don’t want to always feel this way, so wanting that goal badly enough becomes its own kind of motivation. Motivation breeds discipline.

So, in the end, for me, it’s a matter of settling on a goal I want and pursuing it. Sure, there will be bumps along the way, but I know I can do it. So can you.

DLH

Read more at my The Rambling Road weblog...

Read more at my Worldview site...